How to Get Along with Me

• * Be direct and clear
• * Listen to me carefully
• * Don’t judge me for my anxiety
• * Work things through with me
• * Reassure me that everything is OK between us
• * Laugh and make jokes with me
• * Gently push me toward new experiences
• * Try not to overreact to my overreacting.

What I Like About Being a Marilyn

• * being committed and faithful to family and friends
• * being responsible and hardworking
• * being compassionate toward others
• * having intellect and wit
• * being a nonconformist
• * confronting danger bravely
• * being direct and assertive

What’s Hard About Being a Marilyn

• * the constant push and pull involved in trying to make up my mind
• * procrastinating because of fear of failure; having little confidence in myself
• * fearing being abandoned or taken advantage of
• * exhausting myself by worrying and scanning for danger
• * wishing I had a rule book at work so I could do everything right
• * being too critical of myself when I haven’t lived up to my expectations

Marilyns as Children Often

• * are friendly, likable, and dependable, and/or sarcastic, bossy, and stubborn
• * are anxious and hypervigilant; anticipate danger
• * form a team of “us against them” with a best friend or parent
• * look to groups or authorities to protect them and/or question authority and rebel
• * are neglected or abused, come from unpredictable or alcoholic families, and/or take on the fearfulness of an overly anxious parent

Marilyns as Parents

• * are often loving, nurturing, and have a strong sense of duty
• * are sometimes reluctant to give their children independence
• * worry more than most that their children will get hurt
• * sometimes have trouble saying no and setting boundaries