Thoughts

We’re busy getting ready to move.  Not just move, but retire and buy a house, too.  We’ve gotten rid of a lot of things and yet we still have a ton of stuff.  I took down all the children’s drawings, awards and what-not they had taped to their walls, along with the Mickey Mouse Wall Stickers in the playroom.   I keep crossing things off the list, but it doesn’t seem to get any shorter.

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We’ve been going to family grief counseling for a few weeks.  It’s been helpful for all us, even though poking at the hurty spot is never easy.  The counselor is working with me for PTSD.  It’s weird to think that I have that, I thought I was the healthy one in the family!  But it does explain the strange anxieties that have been creeping into my head lately.  In a way, it feels better to know that they are caused by the trauma of Becca’s death, rather than me starting to go crazy.

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We’re flying to Colorado next week to buy a house.  The children are not as excited as I thought they would be.  They told me that they don’t want to move.  We’ve lived here for 4 years and while they do remember living other places, we’ve all put down some roots here.  Maybe after we have a house, it’ll be easier.

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When I told Pumpkin Girl’s piano teacher that we are moving, he said, “Oh no, not my piano prodigy!” I’m not sure what to make of that.  I had suspected that she is gifted in piano, but I wondered if I was just seeing what I wanted to see.  But then again…she’s got me as her mother.  (toot toot)  (that was me, blowing my own horn).  I told her teacher that when she plays Carnegie Hall, we’ll be sure to invite him.

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Philip’s retirement ceremony is June 10th.  I’m quietly freaking out about it.  We need to choose a design for a cake.   (Remember the cake at his last promotion?)We’re thinking about a big fish, with the words, “So long and thanks for all the fish”.  But we’re not sure if enough people will get it.  Another option is a thumbs up with the words “Well done”.  Or a car driving away with “Outta here”.  What do you think?

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